Almost Time For a Return to Scottsdale
September 15, 2005
It’s been just over 6 months since I pedaled up Old La Honda Road and back home via Portola valley. This is one of my favorite rides, 50 odd miles and a few thousand feet of climbing overall. This is one of my favorite bike rides due to the peaceful experience of being on the back roads of Portola Valley alone with my favorite two wheel friend (Serotta Legend, Campy, Veloflex tires) and my thoughts and emotions. This ride reminds me of how much fitness I have loss since surgery and how much fitness has been recovered to date. Cycling has remained one of the simple joys in my life since my late teens.
Camille started middle school at the end of August. The school had a new student orientation night and the three of us, Camille, my ex and I attended. We had a take out dinner together at home after this event. Yes, it’s been over 6 years since my transition and I would not have guessed this would be spending time together like this so many years ago. Time does have a way of healing past hurts.
Our trip for Jen’s labiaplasty is not far away, just over a month from now. Everything is pretty much scheduled and ready. I’m planning to bring a bike again to go cycling in Scottsdale and Phoenix. The first time we were in Scottsdale I had to learn where to go cycling, this time, I’m looking forward to cycling with friends and seeing new places in Phoenix and Scottsdale.
There is not much more to say about my vag, it’s just feels like a part of me that has always been there. I started using estrace vag cream a few months ago to help soften and moisten my vulva. After using this cream for over a month, it works as advertised, but the mess, ick.. Even one gram of this stuff runs out of me after a day or so and makes an icky mess on my undies. I switched to VagiFem inter vaginal estrace tablets. It’s been about a week of so since the switch, but it appears to have the same effect as the cream without the icky mess.
I’m scheduled for Labiaplasty in February 2006 and I’m still sitting on the fence with the breast aug. deciding on the breast aug seemed so simple when I first considered it. Figure out the size you want, decide with the help of your surgeon incision site and implant placement, book a surgery date, do surgery time in the OR and deal with the recovery. That was many months ago, since then I have done two consultations with other surgeons, spoke to a whole lot of women who had this done, did a whole lot of research on this procedure. Now the choice is not so simple. It turns out; your implant size choice is rather limited for a given body if you want them to look reasonable. You typically end up being two cup sizes larger due to the way implants fit on a given body. Even the implant shape is rather limited for a given body. There are possible problems with capsular contracture, implant deflation, post-op asymmetry, eventual implant replacement during one’s life time, etc and what worries me most ‘loss of sensation’ post-op and I keloid badly with any injury. What I discovered after discussing the breast aug procedure with women who had it done was their primary concern was size and appearance and scaring due to incision location. Most were not that concern with loss of sensation, so that was not usually considered a problem for them. For me, the loss of sensation could be the deal breaker. While I’m willing to accept risk, it is the degree of risk that is involved that really matters in my BA decision. The keloid issue can be OK if the incision is made as small as possible. In my case, the bigger the incision, the bigger the keloid post-recovery. I’m booked for LP and BA in February 2006 and my decision on BA has got to happen no later than early December 2005. That is when the bill for these procedures is due.We will see what happens after my consultation date with Dr. Meltzer in October.
I just want to be done and over with all these surgeries. None of them has ever been fun.
We were at a few car events recently, Concorso (Show specifically for Italian Cars), a Lancia owners get together and the British car meet which is a local low key event that is a lot of fun.
Jen’s TR3 just got the engine and transmission installed and a few other items remain to get this car back on the road. It’s looking like late fall and this car will finally be done after being in the garage for nearly two years. To think this started out with a small drip from the back of the transmission.
The devastation caused by storm Katrina and the resulting flood will go down in history as one of the major disasters of our time. The loss of human life and suffering continues to this day on a grand scale. This disaster also illustrates how inept and incompetent bureaucrats in government are as clueless as to how devastation on this level needs to be handled.
The murder trial of Gwen ended with two convicted of 2nd degree murder and one mistrial (again). I’m not at all surprised at the out come. I was surprised that they got even this far. Fact is, most of society continued to believe trans folks are of lesser value to society and these members of humanity are not worthy or equal. I’m no longer able to read any more about the goings on with the Gwen trial. It has become emotionally too much for me to read about this case any more. What makes thing worst is I’m reminded of Gwen’s death on my birthday.
Maybe one day, society can grow to understand who trans folks really are and discard the images and stereotypes perpetuated by the media, Hollywood, religious beliefs against trans folks based on an individuals interpretation, social ignorance and irrational fear of what is not understood of trans folks.
News came from one of my TS woman friends that her boy friend during the past two years proposed marriage to her. She is a recent post op and was hesitant to inform her BF of her history. One day, she did, and during the seconds of silence that appeared to drag on for what appeared to be an eternity, her history was not an issue to him. He loves her for who she is and for not just being physically attractive. It appears that their relationship is based on emotional connections and not just physical attraction or sex. I’m so happy for them. There is also the possibility of me being a bridesmaid at their wedding. What surprises life can bring! They went engagement ring shopping together recently ans she found a ring that was smiling at her. To top that off, the ring was just the right size. It also goes to show how many of those who are post transition many years can find happiness and a rather typical life so many take for granted.
An older couple I met during the trans family event told me their adult child is scheduled for vaginoplasty with Dr. Meltzer some time this fall. I wished then well and spent a bit of time getting to know them. Much to my surprise, I got an email from their daughter with a note of thanks saying that after her folks met me and spent time to get to know me, it changed their perspective of what post transition TS woman are like. I never expected any thing like this to happen or the effect just being me would have on others. It’s a nice feeling to discover spending time with others can have such a positive effect on the lives of others.
It’s been just over 6 months since I pedaled up Old La Honda Road and back home via Portola valley. This is one of my favorite rides, 50 odd miles and a few thousand feet of climbing overall. This is one of my favorite bike rides due to the peaceful experience of being on the back roads of Portola Valley alone with my favorite two wheel friend (Serotta Legend, Campy, Veloflex tires) and my thoughts and emotions. This ride reminds me of how much fitness I have loss since surgery and how much fitness has been recovered to date. Cycling has remained one of the simple joys in my life since my late teens.
Camille started middle school at the end of August. The school had a new student orientation night and the three of us, Camille, my ex and I attended. We had a take out dinner together at home after this event. Yes, it’s been over 6 years since my transition and I would not have guessed this would be spending time together like this so many years ago. Time does have a way of healing past hurts.
Our trip for Jen’s labiaplasty is not far away, just over a month from now. Everything is pretty much scheduled and ready. I’m planning to bring a bike again to go cycling in Scottsdale and Phoenix. The first time we were in Scottsdale I had to learn where to go cycling, this time, I’m looking forward to cycling with friends and seeing new places in Phoenix and Scottsdale.
There is not much more to say about my vag, it’s just feels like a part of me that has always been there. I started using estrace vag cream a few months ago to help soften and moisten my vulva. After using this cream for over a month, it works as advertised, but the mess, ick.. Even one gram of this stuff runs out of me after a day or so and makes an icky mess on my undies. I switched to VagiFem inter vaginal estrace tablets. It’s been about a week of so since the switch, but it appears to have the same effect as the cream without the icky mess.
I’m scheduled for Labiaplasty in February 2006 and I’m still sitting on the fence with the breast aug. deciding on the breast aug seemed so simple when I first considered it. Figure out the size you want, decide with the help of your surgeon incision site and implant placement, book a surgery date, do surgery time in the OR and deal with the recovery. That was many months ago, since then I have done two consultations with other surgeons, spoke to a whole lot of women who had this done, did a whole lot of research on this procedure. Now the choice is not so simple. It turns out; your implant size choice is rather limited for a given body if you want them to look reasonable. You typically end up being two cup sizes larger due to the way implants fit on a given body. Even the implant shape is rather limited for a given body. There are possible problems with capsular contracture, implant deflation, post-op asymmetry, eventual implant replacement during one’s life time, etc and what worries me most ‘loss of sensation’ post-op and I keloid badly with any injury. What I discovered after discussing the breast aug procedure with women who had it done was their primary concern was size and appearance and scaring due to incision location. Most were not that concern with loss of sensation, so that was not usually considered a problem for them. For me, the loss of sensation could be the deal breaker. While I’m willing to accept risk, it is the degree of risk that is involved that really matters in my BA decision. The keloid issue can be OK if the incision is made as small as possible. In my case, the bigger the incision, the bigger the keloid post-recovery. I’m booked for LP and BA in February 2006 and my decision on BA has got to happen no later than early December 2005. That is when the bill for these procedures is due.We will see what happens after my consultation date with Dr. Meltzer in October.
I just want to be done and over with all these surgeries. None of them has ever been fun.
We were at a few car events recently, Concorso (Show specifically for Italian Cars), a Lancia owners get together and the British car meet which is a local low key event that is a lot of fun.
Jen’s TR3 just got the engine and transmission installed and a few other items remain to get this car back on the road. It’s looking like late fall and this car will finally be done after being in the garage for nearly two years. To think this started out with a small drip from the back of the transmission.
The devastation caused by storm Katrina and the resulting flood will go down in history as one of the major disasters of our time. The loss of human life and suffering continues to this day on a grand scale. This disaster also illustrates how inept and incompetent bureaucrats in government are as clueless as to how devastation on this level needs to be handled.
The murder trial of Gwen ended with two convicted of 2nd degree murder and one mistrial (again). I’m not at all surprised at the out come. I was surprised that they got even this far. Fact is, most of society continued to believe trans folks are of lesser value to society and these members of humanity are not worthy or equal. I’m no longer able to read any more about the goings on with the Gwen trial. It has become emotionally too much for me to read about this case any more. What makes thing worst is I’m reminded of Gwen’s death on my birthday.
Maybe one day, society can grow to understand who trans folks really are and discard the images and stereotypes perpetuated by the media, Hollywood, religious beliefs against trans folks based on an individuals interpretation, social ignorance and irrational fear of what is not understood of trans folks.
News came from one of my TS woman friends that her boy friend during the past two years proposed marriage to her. She is a recent post op and was hesitant to inform her BF of her history. One day, she did, and during the seconds of silence that appeared to drag on for what appeared to be an eternity, her history was not an issue to him. He loves her for who she is and for not just being physically attractive. It appears that their relationship is based on emotional connections and not just physical attraction or sex. I’m so happy for them. There is also the possibility of me being a bridesmaid at their wedding. What surprises life can bring! They went engagement ring shopping together recently ans she found a ring that was smiling at her. To top that off, the ring was just the right size. It also goes to show how many of those who are post transition many years can find happiness and a rather typical life so many take for granted.
An older couple I met during the trans family event told me their adult child is scheduled for vaginoplasty with Dr. Meltzer some time this fall. I wished then well and spent a bit of time getting to know them. Much to my surprise, I got an email from their daughter with a note of thanks saying that after her folks met me and spent time to get to know me, it changed their perspective of what post transition TS woman are like. I never expected any thing like this to happen or the effect just being me would have on others. It’s a nice feeling to discover spending time with others can have such a positive effect on the lives of others.
posted by Rupunzell | 10:49 PM
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